Our Islamic Editor Nadia Leona Yunis shares insights into overcoming sad feelings when Ramadan comes towards its end – you may want to save this one for Ramadan’s last ten days or prepare in advance and read it now
This is the Book about which there is no doubt, a guidance for those conscious of Allah.
The Qur’an, Surah Al-Baqarah (Chapter of the cow) 2:2
As another Ramadan draws to an end we may suddenly fall into the ‘Post-Ramadan-Blues’. We have barely broken our final fast before we start to moan: “Oh I feel sad and upset.”
But isn’t Eid a gift from Allah? And should we not be grateful to Allah for this day? And should we not look forward to the celebration?
We seem to give more weight and precedence to other celebrations in our lives – whether they be a birthday, wedding, new born, graduation, or new job, new house (insert the special moment you like to celebrate) – and yet as soon as maghrib (sunset ritual prayer) adhan (call to worship) is called on the final fast we seem to get the ‘Blues’.
Our religion Islam is not about getting the blues or being in a negative state! Yes, things happen, we fall, cry, make up, break up, and cry a little more – but does life end here? Maybe you have been through some of the above struggles so you can relate – because I sure have been through a good few of those myself.
You may be feeling blue because you feel you didn’t do enough – and you feel you should have done more.
When we get into a negative rhetorical we fall downwards and downwards
Listen, you did as much as you could in your circumstance and honestly instead of worrying about how little you did now – as Ramadan is over – make continuous du’a (supplication) that Allah accepts the little you did. I pray that Allah accepts it from you and me.
You may be wondering how I can sound so cold or be so direct about it. You may be thinking, “Does she think she is better than the rest and all her deeds are accepted?” and the answer to your wonderings is, Absolutely NO!
I too am sad that Ramadan is leaving and I too wish I could do more – however when we get into this type of negative rhetorical we fall downwards and downwards. We just got blessed with such a beautiful month and we are already being ungrateful for that by being blue? I mean, we can at least read some voluntary nafl (optional prayer) for gratefulness, right? Or even some voluntary nafl to ask Allah to accept our deeds and allow us to continue, right?
Here’s the thing.
Well, two things.
Firstly, we get hooked on the blues. We listen to and read about what everyone else is saying (think social media – the F word!) and then we may feel we have to feel the same way – so we put ourselves into that state and we become blue and start talking blue.
It’s all in the mind – we are the ones who are thinking what we are thinking.
The Lord of Ramadan is still our Lord outside of Ramadan and how many more opportunities does He (SWT – glorified and exalted be He) bless us with throughout the year which also have extra reward?
Exactly! (Get pen and paper and list them please.)
Secondly, once we get ourselves onto the blue-downward-ride we seem to go round and round. We keep thinking we didn’t do enough – we keep thinking we should have done more – we keep thinking everything is over.
But here’s the deal (halaal/permissible deal) – it’s not over! It’s not over until we are nine feet under!
So do yourselves a favour right now and snap out of it! I’ll be right here when you’re ready to continue and please only five minutes OK? Good!
“I am as My servant’s opinion of Me.”
(Bukhari Book 93, Hadith 502)
Think good of Allah as He is our Creator and He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.
Seriously, if we think negative, negative will happen.
We need to watch what we say to ourselves.
We need to purify our intention and sincerity.
Energy flows where intention goes.
Grab your Qur’an and be thankful to Allah
Think positive of Allah – there is no need whatsoever to think negative of Him. I mean, this is a whole topic in and of itself, however just for now know that if you are reading this then, #1 you are alive, #2 you are more blessed that those in places such as Syria and Palestine right now and, #3 There is ALWAYS hope – ALWAYS!
So take a deep breath in – hold – release and say: “THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE.”
And now, let me ask you – and this is purely for reflection, for you as it is for me – if Ramadan is the month of the Qur’an then how much did you and I read, recite and study the tafseer (exegesis/interpretation)?
And before you slip to the blues again – think RED (it’s my favourite colour).
You know by now that I’m all about self-help (i.e. as Allah says He will not change our condition until we first take that step, right) and I’m a personal development junkie. And if you’re reading this right now then that means you are someone who wants to make positive changes in your life starting right now and prepare for your best akhirah (afterlife) insha’Allah.
See, Ramadan may have left us but we shouldn’t leave it or our ibaadah (worship) from this month.
*Re-read that sentence and reflect on it for a moment.*
This is what the blues does to us – it makes us lose hope!
Did you know that the Qur’an and the Bible are known to be the #1 self-help books?
And you thought that the dude or dudess who got onto the New York #1 bestseller list had all the answers for you. Nope!
And just before I continue, yes I do read self-help and personal development books,and I write on personal development.
However my message is primarily based upon firstly the Qur’an and Sunnah and then everyday life.
Now what this means for us is that Ramadan may have left us for another year – and may Allah bless us with another Ramadan insha’Allah (ameen!) – however it has left you and I with a gift … the gift that it came to remind us about … the gift that we’ve already got on our shelves … the Qur’an.
If you are someone who wants to live a life upon the deen (religious path) and prepare for your best akhirah then, right now, know that Ramadan came to remind you of a gift you already have which you may not connect with very often around the year. Now, dearest soul, is the time to hold on tightly to this gift! Do not fall into the Shaytaan (Satan) trap of the blues.
Listen – it is OK to miss Ramadan and the unity it brings, and the tarawih prayers and the sisterhood/brotherhood – I get it. But don’t let it leave now. It leaves when we hit the downward.
So grab your Qur’an and be thankful to Allah that you have the best and #1 self-help book right with you. In fact it is your ULTIMATE self-help book and with it in your life you can never go wrong.
We make a du’a in Surah Fatihah in which we ask Allah (SWT) to guide us on the ‘Straight Path’ and subhan’Allah (glory be to Allah) – look at the power of our du’a – Allah (SWT) answers it instantaneously in the following Surah where He (SWT) says that THIS BOOK (the Qur’an) is a GUIDANCE for those who are conscious of Allah – aware of Him – fear Him – love Him – want His forgiveness and mercy – this book has the answers!
I invite you to embrace it and promise to read, study, and live by it insha’Allah. I’ll show you how in the tips and action points below. But just before I get there I want to say a big phat EID MABROOK to you and your family from me and my family – taqabbal Allahu minna wa minkum – may Allah accept it from you and us – ameen!
You may not understand everything the Qur’an is saying at the moment – but that is OK because that will change – remember ‘Hope’. Also the thing is that because we are so accustomed to getting advice and help from elsewhere (friends, social media, etc.) we can’t seem to connect to the concept that the Qur’an has all the answers for us.
But all we need to do is look at the Seerah of Rasool Allah (biography of the Messenger of Allah) and we will come to know that, yes, the Qur’an does have all the answers for me as Aisha (RA) said that Rasool Allah was the ‘walking Qur’an’ – he was the Qur’an translated into action.
Tips and Action Points:
- Believe in Allah’s mercy, in His forgiveness – believe that when you ask Him to guide you and straighten your affairs He (SWT) will. Nothing is more powerful in life than belief – and nothing is more powerful than believing that Allah (SWT) will make it alright and He (SWT) will show you the way.
- If you’re having doubts then firstly know it is waswasa from Shaytaan (whispers from Satan) and his job is to lead us off course, and secondly think of all the times that Allah helped you (specifically where something major was happening and you called out to Him – we’ve all had that moment in our lives).
- Purify your intention and sincerity – these two points are really important for us in all that we do, so let’s make it a habit to purify them at each step insha’Allah.
2. Make a Qur’an Plan
- Just like making a ‘To-Do’ list or scheduling your diary make a plan for your Qur’an. So, in this plan you will write how much you will recite each day, what times, for how long and when will you study the tafseer, attend Qur’an courses (including hifz/memorisation and tajweed/elocution), and what resources you will use. Some of the resources you could use are online YouTube videos (Like Qur’an Weekly Ramadan Gems – if you haven’t already then I highly recommend you watch them all: 30 short 5 to 10 min videos), books, and teachers (maybe private teachers). There are a lot of resources available to us – you have to be curious enough to do your own research – that is your study part, you can’t expect anyone to do it for you. Also in this plan you could include Family Qur’an Time – especially if you have younger siblings or children; this is the best self-help start you can give your family insha’Allah.
3. Your Dream Team
- Who is in your world? I.e. Who are your friends? Time for a friend check-up!
- You want a team who will help you realise not only your potential as a human and what you’re capable of achieving but also a team who loves the Qur’an just as you do – for there is nothing worse than having those in your life who don’t share the same passions and who don’t love and appreciate the Qur’an and its message!
- In this dream team you have your supporters, mentors and coaches. And you can fulfil one of these roles in someone else’s dream team.
We all need A* players in our world – on our side. Allah created us social beings and it is in social settings we thrive and excel.
Your dream team will be there to support you through all your ups and downs and will encourage you to excel. This special team is called your ‘Qur’an Dream Team’. Go create yours right now insha’Allah.
The Qur’an creates a special kind of connection with our Rabb (Lord) Allah – He is speaking to us through the Qur’an and we need to make it our #1 Book in our life insha’Allah.
I do hope and pray that this post today does help you in one way or another. Please leave me your comments and let me know what three things you will do right now to keep the Ramadan spirit alive and connecting with your very own #1 self-help book – the Qur’an! : )
Nadia Leona Yunis is the Islamic Editor for Young Muslimah Magazine and is a personal coach in Islamic personal and spiritual development at We Be Inspired on whose site this article was first published: http://www.webeinspired.com/blog/archives/08-2013